I know you’re stressed, but I promise you it will get better. The holidays are coming up and you’re dealing with a lot. It will be your first major holiday without him and it will be a tough one. Everyone will ask about you two and everyone will do it awkwardly, it will be painful. You will want to hide in the guest house, but I promise it will get better. Life does go on and you will find the love of your life.
School is intense. This year will be your most difficult. You will want to quit. Baking will keep you sane and it will also make you a lot of friends. Don’t make those chocolate cake cookies, though. No one will like them and they are pretty disgusting (it’s not you, it’s the recipe). Try to get out more and don’t isolate yourself in your apartment. Don’t take on more than you can handle (though you will regardless) and learn to take time for yourself. Even though grades are important now, they aren’t everything. Allow yourself time away from the books, enjoy your college years.
Don’t worry so much about your appearance. For the next 10 years you will obsess over everything you eat, wear and you will work out way more than you need to. Don’t waste your time worrying over this small stuff, you will miss out on so much because of a few people. Don’t let your life revolve around issues of vanity.
As far as medicine is concerned, it may not be your passion now, but it will become the thing you love most. You will move across the country to practice it, you will neglect your friends and family and you will fall in love with healing your patients. This is ok. You will cry and complain. It will be the most difficult thing you will ever do, but it will be the one constant in your life and it will allow you to do so much. Fall in love with medicine, because it will give back to you beyond anything you can imagine.